I am not a smart man....
I am not a smart man. I have these blindspots of judgement that make me wonder what was I thinking. I do things that are not consistent with the high ideals and lofty language that I post here. I am, to some degree, immature and a hypocrite.
Yet we all have stupid days and stupid moments. It's a part of the human experience. Our flaws (as well as our gifts) make us human. I'm always scared I am going to forget that. I am afraid that I am going to think I am this great spiritual writer guy and so condemn myself to never be that person. Pride destroys. It kills someone's soul in a battle for our lives. We all fight this spirtual cancer. Nobody is exempt. This terrifies me.
One day, a couple years back, my mom, brother and sister and I were talking about our biological dad. A couple years earlier he left us for another women. My mom said something I will never forget. She told us that the reason that he left was because he thought he was too strong. He didn't thing he could fall. So he did.
more later
Daniel
posted by Daniel @ 10:27 上午
6 comments
6 Comments:
you know smart or not, dude you write from the heart, and that is all that matters. and you are smart, why else would god give you the enlarged cranium? (geesh dan- think buddy) AHAHAHA- mrt
ps. I am the ghost...
I must agree with the previous comment. Although I think that we approach the Faith from very different angles, one thing that I admire in your postings, that is lacking in my own (because of wariness after negative experiences in the past), is a total, unreserved, open honesty.
You appear to type as the thoughts and feelings flow, and that is the best thing that you can do. I, too, do this, but then I edit what I have typed before posting, just to be careful.
I'm sorry that this has happened in your family, but I am glad that you have decided to learn from the mistake of another.
Pax tecum,
Michael x
As far as the honesty goes, it's a concentrated effort to the point of excruciation. I don't always feel like I have a vent to really say what's on my mind in my community of faith. Consider it a rebellion against a society who is so isolated that people will talk by computer in the same dorm room (I have heard this happening before!) Sadly, this isolation pervades even the church. Our trials and ecstasies are the only thing that we won't share in the body and THEY ARE THE ONLY THING WE NEED TO. All this surface talk is rubbish. That's why I post, because sharing is a basic human need and I need to do it.
This has very little to do with your reply Michael, but I red your posts and I thought it was cool...
As far as the different angles though, I really respect the more traditional churches because they have a context. Modern evangelicalism sometimes tries to cut themselves off from that "great cloud of witnesses" Hebrews talked about. Tradition, I think at it's best, connects you with all the people who cam before and all the people who came after.
Being guity of having communicated on MSN messenger in the past, with somebody who was in the same room, I admit that this is very indicative of a society where the effort to get up and ghreet a friend is considered to be too much when there is an easier way.
I think your reply addressed my post well. :-)
Your comment about being one with all those who have gone before and those who will come after strikes a note with me. It is very conversant with my constant awareness that The Church - militant, expectant, triumphant - is so much more than me, throughout space and time, and that despite the deep personal pain that it sometimes causes, I must accept her authority, for although my own reasoning, thoughtm studying of scripture can enlighten me only so far, there is a 'great cloud of witnesses' (to borrow your quote from the letter to the Hebrews) who have thrashed all of this out for centuries in the past, and they have brought us to hwere we are today.
That is what Sacred Tradition is all about. Perhaps I was wrong in my previous assessment about our differences.
M x
My apologies for bringing up a brash subject so quickly, but I have to ask, what does "accept her authority mean?" I hate bringing up a question like this because it reeks of stereotypes that protestants have toward orthodox (all the tiresome arguements for and against infalliable authority come to mind). I hate stuff that divides people, especially since we have such a good conversation going on. But I have had issues with authority that refuses God even when they claim to speak for them. (It's why I don't consider myself pentecostal as I was raised.) What about the crusades? Like I said, it's more a question from personal pain then a desire to provoke.
Daniel
Hello,
Now that blogspot seems to be allowing m to post again, I can reply to this, mainly for the sake of your readership, as you will have received my e-mail from earlier today.
The authority of the Church is based on Sacred Scripture and Holy Tradition - as I pointed out in my mail, the is upper-case 'T' Tradition, and not mere traditions. This is explained in the first post on my blog, entitled, 'My starting point'.
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